Birds, Twigs and Man flue

Going through my cupboards I came across this coffee set, they have been sat in the cupboard for around two years.  I came into their possession when his lordship went to help a friend clear out his deceased mother’s house.  

They are not really my usual choice, in fact they are quite ugly and I doubt I will ever use them, but they belonged to an old lady and although that old lady was not my mother, she was some ones mother, hence I cannot bring myself to throw them out.  I am not sure what the animals are that make up the handles on the cups, milk and sugar pot but I have a sneaking suspicion that are young bears. Anyway not sure what to do with them so “back in the cupboard with you”

It was one of those kinds of days, you know, when you have loads to do but the body is not really wiling.  Doesn't help that his lordship has contracted “Man Flue” and is busy coughing and wheezing like nothing on this earth and feeling very sorry for himself.  I have experienced man flue before but no one can pull it off better than an Italian,   honestly you would think that he had something serious and not just some seasonal cold.  I sent him to bed reminding him that “winters coming, there are logs and twigs to sort out and that Mother Nature doesn't stop just because someone has the sniffles”.  Still I am making him chicken soup in my slow cooker for supper that’ll buck him up.

I spent most of the day outside with the birds and in between twigging I tried, to get a decent photo of the Farone, tricky little buggers to sneak up on and they squeal like a couple of queens.  His lordship has named them Dolce & Gabbana.

Oh and I found a suitable home for my cushions covers that I bought back, I call it my English chair, ok so there is a bit of tartan in there but it is red white and blue.

Sitting outside on this beautiful Monday morning,  slightly over hung by sleep, drinking my coffee and minding my own business, I got hit by  something, looking around I didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary and carried on with my drink.  Again something hit me and then I saw it, the black squirrel was perched up in my walnut tree throwing skins down at me, cheeky little devil, I was almost tempted to throw them back in what could be considered a childish moment but then reigned myself in, after all this was just a squirrel going about his day stealing nuts when and wherever he could find them.

Prince Giacomo deigned to return over the weekend and is now chained until we can work out where he got out in the first place.  Princess Dolly had a few words to say to him, he didn’t like it much and tried to skulk off.   Silly old fool couldn’t get back in the same way and sat outside the gates whining to be let in and of course offered no explanation as to where he had been, mind you the marks on his nose would suggest that a fight had taken place somewhere on his travels.  I am of course pleased for his return, it means that his Lordship has come out of his funk, thank the lord, I couldn't take much more of the hang dog expression he's been wearing of late.

Went into work this morning but not much happening on that front, the secretary was in some kind of strop, when I said good morning and asked if everything was ok, all I got back was a grunt.  May be she was hungry, so the next time I go in I will be more thoughtful, I will take some buns in to throw them at her.   Big boss man will be back from his holiday this week, this could be fun, I suspect he thinks I have conquered the UK market and have made his fortune so that he can retire.  Dream on J I’m good at my work but I don’t work miracles.

The Farone were let out of prison today, now you would think, having been incarcerated since they got here that they would be over excited and all unnecessary at being given their freedom, but no, they couldn't have been more miserable, dragging their heels  un like the hens who bombarded past.. Note to self Farone are extremely sensitive birds and are prone to become institutionalised within days.

So as I am sitting here typing this I can hear one of the chickens making a right old racket, I shouted out to his lordship “what on earth are you doing to that poor chicken?”   I could hear him chuckling to himself as he walked up the garden towards me (so reminded me of my dad) and the chicken was still giving it some.  Turns out it was the chicken attacking him, silly old fool tried to collect the egg she was sitting on and she went off at him full throttle...is this a sign that the cockerel may of done  his job?  Bit late in the year for babies I would of thought, perhaps she is just feeling broody.

This afternoon my mobile kept ringing; I don’t normally answer it, as let’s face it, who, is going to be contacting me out here.  Anyway never being one to successfully ignore a squealing phone I gave in, it was some strange Italian man waffling on (probably waving his arms around at the same time) and as the signal kept dropping I hung up on him.  Three more calls and I took the phone down the garden to his lordship, I am so glad I did, it was a courier saying he had a parcel for me. Yay my slow cooker has just arrived, I can envisage all sorts of crap going into and coming out of thatJ

Scorpions, toilet roll cores, mend & make do and missing dogs

Where are these scorpions coming from? That is the second one I've found in my bathroom, this time skulking around in my bath tub.  As I haven’t yet had the pleasure of using said tub I tossed that sucker outside, suspect it will come back in and bite my ass at some point. 

Whilst on the subject of bathroom, I would like to point out to my daughter that hers is not the only household that suffers from empty toilet roll syndrome, but at least I get little messages and pictures on my cores.

On the weather front it started off quite nicely, lulling me into a false sense of security and allowing me time to hang out a load of washing, of course once I had completed the task and sat down for lunch the heavens opened and my washing is now getting an extra rinse.

I ventured into work this morning and was greeted by one of the staff claiming the secretary was not in the office today, I just smiled and told her not to worry as I knew what I was doing and continued on my way, ten minutes later a rather blustery secretary burst through the door.  I don’t know what she thinks I am going to get up to but it makes me chuckle.  I think she is secretly pissed off that I have worked out the passwords and don’t need her assistance, and in turn she can’t snoop on what I am doing.  On the good side I managed to get a couple of responses from my Liqueur inquiries, one of them from a completely confused Russian, and after reading his email I am more than a little confused myself J

I spend yesterday in the “mend and make do” mode, using some odd strips of fabric I had kicking around I fashioned a duvet cover and dressed up some plain pillow cases.  

and if you flip it over...taaaaa daaaaah...

Every girl should sleep on a bed of roses!

I've now run out of fabric and am itching to make something else...so in the meantime I will just have to make do with a cup of tea.

Prince Giacomo has been missing for the last three days L  He got out to chase off two stray dogs and that was the last we saw of him.  He’s either found a bitch and is exercising his right to spread his seed or he’s found himself a better food supply. Either way he needs to get his act together before I am tempted to rent his space out to a goat! 

Catch up

I saw a squirrel this morning, as black as the ace of spades, it was swinging around in my trees, it was that black it was like looking into a black hole, of course I would know this as I do it so often J  Got me to wondering if that huge black cat, I thought I saw, the other day is either related or could it be that it was a whole gaggle of black squirrels holding hands and flying through my trees together?

Anyway, we got another two arrivals the other day, a pair of Faraone (as in Pharaoh) turns out they are Guinea Fowl, and lovely things they are.  Poor little birds didn't know what had hit them,   They were unceremoniously packaged up in a brown box and shoved in the boot of the car.  When his lordship arrived home he was all excited and unnecessary, demanding me to come have a look, silly old fool tried to  raise the lid and one escaped , of course it was then up to me to take up pursuit, trying my hardest to get to it before Prince Giacomo (who loved this new game), as if that wasn't bad enough we had to take my only pair of dress making scissors (impressed not) and cut the flight wings, thus making them ground hoggers and less of a flight risk, they were then escorted and placed in prison, purely for their own protection, hens can be really nasty creatures .

On a plus note the hens are happily laying once more and long may it continue.  His lordship, who likes to think of all the comforts a hen might need, has placed within the hen house, several boxes with straw to serve as nesting boxes, we noticed today that there was a queue forming around just one box, perplexed by this he took one or two of the eggs and placed them in the other boxes hoping that they might catch on.   Several hours later his lordship ventured back down and lo and behold they were still insistent on queuing for the one box.  Note to self:  Hens like to queue.

On Friday, I suggested to his lordship that the very next project in the house would be to put some shelves into  what should be my wardrobe, it’s actually an alcove waiting to be converted, we got as far as a couple of hanging rails and that’s how it stayed for the last couple of years.  When I think about shelves I imagine something smooth and sleek which appears to be the complete opposite to what he imagines.

Talk about sturdy, I asked how safe they were and to prove his point he climbed up on the first one and proceeded to prance about.  They look more like decking to me, but he has decided that he has found the perfect solution for extra beds when the Grandchildren visit J

This morning I actually went into work, the internet was functioning once more or so the secretary would have me believe.  According to outside sources there was nothing wrong with the internet and the secretary is suffering from a bout of jealousy, she has played this game before with some other unsuspecting colleague.   Oh for goodness sake, what is wrong with people, I am sorry for her because she may of just met her match, I may not be fluent in her language but I can still stand my ground and make my feelings  very clear -“ Ain’t nobody got no time for that”

Logs, sticks, pecking order, new arrivals and limocello

Bolloxs I thought to myself, if the secretary can't be bothered to phone me to let  me know if the internet is working again, I can't be bothered either.  So work seems to be off the cards again today, I am suspicious that the secretary thinks I am after her job and that she doesn't like sitting in my incredible shade. Perhaps I should turn up tomorrow and when she says "sorry the internet is still not working" I will reply with "it's ok I am just typing up letters today",  how do you like them apples missy :)

So what to do with the rest of this glorious day, think I'll just have a coffee while I think about it, no that's not going to work, just noticed Prince Giacomo on the other side of the fence which means yet another hole to block, cor you should of seen the colour of the air when his lordship found out :)
I kept out to the way, I had logs to collect and stack, however I ended up interrupting him because I needed some adjustments making to the wood shed so that I could re stack to get more in.  He was very obliging of his time but I could hear him muttering under his breath "Non capito, non capito" ("I don't understannd, I don't understand") I couldn't decide if that was in reference to Prince Giacomos latest escape or me and my demands :)

I'll just gather and stack up the logs that are laying around:

and re organise the shed.

No it's not full and it will take a lot  more than this to get us through the winter months.

Not sure what is going on in the world of fowl, but there has been a distinct ruffling of feathers in the ranks of late. The hens have refused to lay, which means I am delayed in making Tabithas birthday cake and that will just not do.  It would seem that there is now a divide in the colours, the whites have moved to the top of the garden whilst anything with so much as a hint of colour is staying happily down the bottom end.

Although I would not normally encourage this sort of behavior, not being pc and all that, the hens have started laying again, yay, now if the Geese and Ducks can just get off their high horses and start laying all will be well.

and just to reward the hens for getting back to the egg laying we decided to get them some extra help.

Welcome Milly and Molly.

Marcello (a whole other story) turned up today, he lives just two fields away but I haven't seen him in more than 2 years.  I am wondering what he wants, but being the neighborly sort I made him a coffee and accepted the cigarette he offered me.  His lordship and Marcello went out for the afternoon to fetch the two newbies, which of course softened the blow at being left to lug logs alone, but I will let them off as Marcello sent over a couple of tots of home made Limoncello and a couple of tots of Limoncello cream.  Ok so a bottle would of been most acceptable but I know these will slip down easily enough.

Me thinks I will be sleeping well tonight, cheers x

Walnuts, rubber gloves and Gypsy Hands

So I jumped out of bed this morning to the sound of a saw in action, rushing outside to investigate I found his lordship swinging his chain saw around and threatening one of the Walnut trees.  Before I could so much as blink he hacked off two branches and then kept going, I have to say as much as I didn't like the idea of dismembering the tree, it has bought in a lot more sunlight and of course some much needed logs for the winter.

Of course all this action meant more work for me, no surprise there then.   Luck didn't seem to be on my side and I didn't get to rush off to the office, the internet had gone down yesterday and they were still waiting for a technician to arrive so there was no choice but to get on with it.  First things first, I had to find buckets, now when I left here, I had masses of buckets old and new but for some reason they seemed to be scattered far and wide around the property and no one seems to know why, and the best I could do was an old paint bucket with a hole in it.  I used to know a song about that :)

After much faffing about I managed to fill 3 such buckets (one held together with brown parcel tape) with the walnuts that I stripped from the felled branches.  His lordship still managed to find a reason to go out on some errand or other, so I thought sod it and sat out side with a well deserved cuppa, as I sat contemplating the meaning of life, whilst bathing in the warm yellow sunshine, my ears were drawn to a noise coming from one of the other trees, as I looked up I could of sworn I saw a huge black cat, and when I say huge I mean of the Panther variety, it moved pretty damn quick and the whole tree shook as it ran off, rubbing my eyes in the "did I just see that" kind of way I sat back down and wondered if all these walnuts were giving off some kind of hallucinogenic.  Anyway no sign of cat now but I think I will be a bit cautious about going out in the dark for a while. Lunch over, I actually got his lordship to sit down with a knife and help me peel the walnuts.  Well what a joy that was, 4 hours of silently peeling, apart from the sound that has been bugging me for days.  The sound has been there in the background as I mentioned for a few days, it seems to be off in the distance and sounds like someone calling out for help. I asked his lordship about it and he shrugged his shoulders and said "Help me, I have no food", well the sound had left me with a kind of sick feeling to my stomach that I have not been able to shift, so I suggested we should go and investigate, he gave me one of his quizzical looks and left it at that. I can't tell you how much this noise has bothered me and then it dawned on me...that it was not some poor person shouting out but a ruddy goat, no wonder he gave me such an odd look when I wanted to go sort it out!
Anyway back to the walnuts, the three buckets loads are now peeled and hanging in some old nets under the portico to dry.  Now you would think that peeling walnuts would  be a harmless sort of task to do and if you are wearing gloves then it is...

or at least you would think, that stuff must be strong or I had a hole in both gloves.

But his lordship decided that he would just man up

Apparently he now has Gypsy hands (but not of the big fat type), I just couldn't persuade him to rub them over his face.  I do have 3 buckets (more to follow) of walnut skins so if anyone out there has got a shed load of stuff to dye walnut brown please feel free to help yourselves.

Brambles, escapees, fence mending and nuts

Once again unto the breach, I stumble blindly in this amazing sunshine.  Today's task is to continue with yesterdays task, but maybe a little more gently, I mean it is Sunday.  Fed up with constantly being attacked by the abundance of brambles that stretch from one end of the garden to the other I decided that enough was enough and they would  have to go.  I mean, I like brambles as much as the next person, but as these particular brambles have never produced anything that even slightly resemble fruit, they are not contributing to the income of this household so they can jog on by.  As luck would have it I stumble across a pair, of what were once known as pruning sheers, so I spent most of the morning trying my damnedest to sharpen them without much success.



There was only such much I could do with them and really, they were better than nothing.  They did, however, get  me reminiscing about my childhood and the pair of  lovely grinders my dear old dad used to have in his shed, I really could of done with those today.   However I did manage to clear some of the debris away, we now have something that could closely resemble a pathway.

In between sharpening and hacking, I was being harassed by 2 of the males in my life,  who, for some reason think that I just sit on my ass for most of the day so can therefore be interrupted at their will.  It would seem the next thing on the agenda would be fence fixing, Prince Giacomo had been plotting his escape and was away on his toes before we could stop him.  On a Sunday we have a shed load of cyclist thundering through the forest, so for Prince Giacomo, this is far to irresistible, nothing finer than to chase some poor cyclist through the undergrowth, funny how their speed picks up when a dog appears behind them.  So fence mending was a priority as we could do without a law suit resulting from one of Prince Giacomos Sunday pursuits.

Now whilst this fence repairing was underway, I played the role of "pass me this and pass me that" all very technical stuff, consisting of some old roof tiles, various sizes of wooden stakes and some garden wire.  I busied myself with the task in hand but suddenly got the feeling that someone or something was watching me, there on the other side of the fence was Princess Dolly all smiles and mischief, so you can guess what the afternoon was going to consist of.

Moving swiftly on it is at this time of year or thereabouts that I begin to gather up my nuts!  Hazlenuts, Walnuts and two different varieties of Chestnuts, now you must of heard me moan on many occasions about the amount of prickles my poor hands go through but it's worth it in the end as his Lordship takes them all down to a local grocer and sells them, yay for income.  This year it is just not going to happen, it would seem that all our nut trees have some disease or other , and according to the locals it is all down to the Chinese!  As there are no Chinese in the immediate vicinity to ask for the cure I am at a bit of a loss, so if anyone out there can further advise me on this matter I would be very grateful.

Now talking about nuts, this is the kind of nut I'm talking about, large clean and hopefully crunchy.

Nuts or not it's that time of day when I am just to knackered to do anything much other than slob out, so I am going to sit back on my lovely red couch, watch the first episode of  The Hunger Games and try to pretend it's the first time I have ever watched it else wise he'll be flipping the channels.